Author: Lady of Spain
Rating: VM16+
Beta: TheMightyRen
Word Count: 7499
This story takes place after Edward proposes, 6 wks before the wedding date. Jacob makes a last ditch effort to be alone with Bella one last time and make her see that she is making the wrong choice.
Disclaimer: I don't pretend to own any of these characters. They are the property of S. Meyer.
Halfway To Paradise
I want to be your lover
But your friend is all I stay
I'm only halfway to paradise
So near, yet so far away
I long for your lips to kiss my lips
But just when I think they may
You lead me halfway to paradise
So near, yet so far away
Bein' close to you is almost heaven
But seein' you can do just so much
It hurts me so to know your heart's a treasure
And that my heart is forbidden to touch,so
Put your sweet lips close to my lips
And tell me that's where they're gonna stay
Don't lead me halfway to paradise
Mmm, so near, yet so far away.
Oh, uh, oh so near, yet so far away
Yeah, yeah, so near, yet so far away.
Tony Orlando
What a sap I was, sitting here pining over a girl who can't see what was in front of her own face. I was so pathetic. I had been listening to this old song by Tony Orlando, over and over, and over. Yup, it pretty much summed up the relationship between good ol' supportive Jacob Black and Bella Swan "the clueless". Maybe I should have gotten a lobotomy. That would 've put an end to the continuous invasion of thoughts flooding my brain; thoughts about the girl with the chocolate brown eyes . . . the soft chestnut colored hair . . . those long legs. Ugh! If I could have just surgically removed all those memories . . . I could've been happy again, a drooling imbecile, but happy.
I put the CD back in the player cuing it once more. I sighed, and plopped my head back on my pillow, staring at the ceiling. Embry walked into my room and turned off the CD. "No, not this song again!" he barked. "Jeez, Jake, will you look at yourself? You're letting this engagement thing turn you into a whimpering puppy. What happened to the Big Bad Wolf? Where did the Jacob Black I know disappear to? I can't stand seeing you like this. You've let yourself be reduced to a blob of misery, by a girl who doesn't give a damn about your feelings!"
"Don't talk about her like that, Embry. She does care about my feelings. Bella hates that she's been hurting me, but she loves me, I know she does."
"If she loves you like you say she does, then do something about it. Get your butt out of this bed and do something. You can't let that leech gloat over this. You've never backed down from a fight before, so don't start now. "
"I did everything I could, Embry. I'm comin' up empty here. I don't know what else to do."
"Convince her that she's making a big mistake. Get her away from him for awhile. Even if you fail, at least go down fighting. I know you'll think of something. You've got to. This behavior has to stop. It's driving the rest of the pack nuts! You're my best friend Jake, please for my sanity and yours, come up with a plan. And in your best interest, I'm taking this CD home with me."
Embry ambled out the door, slamming it behind him.
I sat up with my head in my hands. Embry was right. I was a gelatinous blob, my spine had somehow been replaced by yellow jello. Yellow . . . Yeah, I was afraid to face a frail little girl. Who was I kidding,? She wasn't frail; she knew the hold she had on me. She might as well have been personally tightening my thumb screws. Okay Jake, time to wolf up!
I wasn't exactly Christopher Lowell when it came to planning an event. And let's face it, LaPush wasn't the capital entertainment of the world either. So it was with a heavy heart that I sat in front of the TV set with Billy that night watching the news. The weather report began; rain on Monday . . . big surprise . . . rain on Tuesday . . . blah, blah, blah . . . sunny with a light chance of rain on Wednesday. Poor Edward, he'd have to keep his sparkles to himself on that day. He wouldn't be able to visit Bells. Hey, wait a minute . . . she could come visit me. Yeah, but where could I take her so that I'd have her all to myself.
The imaginary light bulb above my head suddenly flickered to life. Charlie and Billy spent hours in a boat every other weekend. There was no one to bug them, just the sea gulls, the salt air, and the rolling waves.
"That's it!" I shouted as I sprung straight up off the couch.
Billy almost lost his balance. "What's it?" Billy asked in alarm.
"Do you think Bells would go fishing with me?"
"Son, are you feeling okay? This is Bella you're talking about. And you're not that fond of the sport yourself!"
"Sure, sure, but this isn't really about fishing, this is about being alone with her. If I can guilt her into it, we can have hours to spend together, before she goes off and marries that freak." I thought that sounded pretty damn confident.
Billy grinned, "That's my boy, a chip off the ol' Black."
My plan was falling into place, I only hoped it didn't fall apart. I'd call Bells first thing in the morning and charm her into the boat with me.
XXX
At nine o'clock, I called Bells."Hey Bells, do ya miss me? No . . . Don't answer that. You'll hurt my feelings."
"I do miss you Jake. You know better than that," she asserted.
"Do I . . . ? You've got a lot on your mind, wedding plans, honeymoon, becoming one of the eternally damned. There's no room in that head of yours to think about your best friend. You have no time to see poor ol' understanding Jacob."
"That's not fair Jake, you know I'd come see you if I could. What do you want me to do?" she entreated me.
"To tell you the truth, I thought maybe we could get together for a few hours this Wednesday. It'll be sunny out, so the lee . . . sorry, Edward will have to stay inside. This will be the last chance I'll ever get to be alone with you. Please, Bells, say yes . . . for me? It could be our final curtain call. You know things between us will never be the same when you're . . . you know, changed, right?" Ooh, that was good, she has to say yes. She'll feel so guilty if she deprives me of this one last meeting.
"J-Jake," she stammered, "I . . . I don't know."
I tried to sound as pitiful as possible, which wasn't hard to do considering how pitiful I actually felt. "Okay, I understand. I guess this is our goodbye then, huh? I love you Bells . . . bye." I whispered the last words into the phone. I waited a beat, and sure enough I heard the answer to my prayers.
"Well, I could get away for a few hours I guess. After all, Edward and I do have eternity to be together."
YES . . . ! Operation rowboat ready to launch. I did my darnedest not to sound too excited, but damn, my heart was skipping beats. "Do you really mean it Bells; you'll go fishing with me?"
"Fishing?"she teased, " Who are you, and what have you done with my Jacob? You hate fishing, Jake."
"But Bells, that's not the point. We can be in our own little world, just the two of us, floating on the waves, basking in the sunshine. For a few hours we can just be - just Jake and Bells."
"Okay, you won this round. I'll meet you at your house at ten, on Wednesday."
"Sure, sure. I'll be ready." I hung up the phone and danced around the room. Yes, yes, yes!
XXX
My two best friends in the whole world came by the next day. They were surprised to see the new and improved, Jacob Black.
"What have you been snorting?" Quil asked.
"I don't need no stinkin' drugs. I'm tanked up on high octane love!"
Embry seemed pleased."I'm glad for you man. who is she? Do we know her?"
"Yep!"
"C'mon, Jake, spill."
"You guys know me - who else would it be?"
Quil cursed loudly, "Damnit, Jake. We had such high hopes for you. And now you're gonna let Bella put you through the wringer . . . again? I never saw such a glutton for punishment."
"Aha! But this time I have a plan," I proudly announced. "I'm taking her fishing. We'll be hours and hours on the ocean. No vamps, no Charlie, just me, Bells and a bucket of worms."
My declaration was met with utter silence. Then, they looked at one another and broke into roars of laughter.
"Oh man, you've got to be kidding. How did you get her to agree to that?" Embry guffawed.
"Laugh all you want guys. I happen to know that she couldn't withstand my attempts at persuasion."
"Picture it, Embry," Quil mocked, "the romantic couple in the Love Rowboat!
That started up the laughter, even louder than before.
Now, I was getting defensive. "You got a better idea?"
"The back seat of your Rabbit comes to mind," Quil chortled. "At least then, you wouldn't have to worry about miss clumsy scuttling the boat!"
"Or worse yet, falling overboard," Embry taunted. Then he added, "It's gonna be a bear trying to make any moves on her with the boat swaying."
"Guys . . . get your minds out of the gutter, will ya? This isn't an all out attack to take advantage. I want her to be aware of her other option, that's all. I'm trying to save a beating heart from certain doom. Does that seem funny to you?"
"I guess not," Embry said, looking remorseful. "You gotta admit though, Bella and you in a rowboat is a recipe for disaster. Maybe you should watch Titanic tonight to brush up on boat safety. With Bella on board, you could possibly run into an iceberg."
"That's enough, get out, guys!"
Quil gave me a smirk, and quipped, "Ooh, Mr. Grudgemeir has reared his ugly head. I am very disappointed in you, Jake. That girl has made a pantywaist out of you."
"You guys deaf? I said GET OUT!" I'm sure the whole street heard me yell that time.
"Yes sir, Cap'n Jack," Embry saluted me. "C'mon, Ladmo, we know when we're not appreciated."
"Comin', Wal Boy!"
The two of them started singing, "Row, row, row your boat," as they waltzed out the door.
I had to ask, why do I torture myself by hanging out with these losers? Oh right, because I'm an idiot. I definitely need to socialize more so I can pick out another pair of buds. A couple of mimes would be good. I shrugged it off, and starting preparing for our adventure. I caught myself whistling... row, row, row your boat. Ugh!
XXX
It was Wednesday, I was gathering the supplies for the trip. Compass . . . check . . . fishing poles . . . check . . . ice and cooler . . . check . . . first aid kit . . . double check. Bait, extra hooks, sunblock, fishin' hats, lunch, soap and water, yep, I think I've got it all. I was piling it into the rabbit, when my concentration was suddenly interrupted by the sound of a familiar truck pulling into the driveway. She's here, she's here, my brain shouted.
I ran out and grabbed her in a bear hug before her feet even alighted from the vehicle. I swung her around, while she gasped, the usual, "Can't breathe, Jake."
I put her down lightly. "Sorry, I'm just so glad to see you, Bells."
"It's only been three weeks, Jake,"she remarked.
"Three looong weeks," I corrected.
"Well let's get started then, here - I made some fried chicken and potato salad."
"Hey, great!" I tossed it into the cooler, and closed the trunk. I took Bella's hand, headed back to the house and announced our departure to Billy. "Hey dad, we're leaving!"
Billy wheeled out of his bedroom."Don't forget the first aid kit. Remember, who you're taking with you," he chuckled. Then he remarked, "Good luck, son," and gave me a knowing wink.
Bells presented me with a questioning look, and asked, "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Dunno," I shrugged, feigning innocence. "Gettin' senile, I guess."
"Ouch, that hurts," I heard him mutter, as he escaped back to his room.
XXX
I was as excited as a little kid going to Disneyland. I bounced along the ground like Tigger, escorting Bells to the Rabbit.
I chattered all the way to the dock. Bells hardly got a word in edgewise. She looked worried; probably wondering what I had up my sleeve ( two strong arms aching to hold you Bells, that's what).
Bella helped me unload all the equipment and transfer it to the boat. I guess my skiff wouldn't look like much to a Cullen's eye. They probably own a yacht. Anyway, for my purposes it was perfect, big enough to haul our stuff, and small enough, so we would have to squeeze in tight. Well, maybe that was a little exaggerated, but still, it required us to sit pretty close together. I could think of no sweeter sardine to be packed up against.
The day was perfect. The sun was glowing in the sky. There were just a few puffy clouds dotting the horizon, and a mild breeze tickled our skin.
I found the sunblock and handed it to Bella. She applied it quickly over her face and throat.
"Jake," she asked, "Can you get the rest of my neck and shoulders? I can't reach back there."
Was she kidding me? I felt like I'd be touching holy ground. I'm a smart boy, so I answered, "Hell, yeah!"
She scowled at me, "Don't get carried away, Black."
Bella lifted the hair away from her neck. The aroma of her strawberry scented mane filled the air; it almost knocked me senseless. Her skin was so soft and warm. I was in heaven, smoothing the cream over the places she missed - and some she didn't - just to have the experience last a few minutes longer. Jeez, I wished her shirt had been cut just a little bit lower.
She handed the sunblock back to me."Aren't you going to use any?" Bella inquired.
I nearly laughed. Look at me, do ya think I would need sunblock? Then a devious idea popped into my brain . . . Bella's small hands covered in cream, her fingers massaging it into my now tingling skin.
I choked back a laugh, and tried to reassemble my face, so it would appear serious. I squirted a dollop into my palm and slathered it on. Oh my, I seem to have squeezed out too much. "Uh Bella, can you take some of this off my hands and get the back of my neck too?"
She scooted closer to me . . . so far so good . . . her little hands scooped the cream a few times from my palms. It was like ultrasound gel, conducting the electrical impulses straight to my brain and down to my waiting heart. The shock jolted my heart into an erratic rhythm, one that would send any cardiologist into a frenzy. Then, her hands did their magic. Those tiny fingers stroking my neck sent more sparks shooting down my spine. It was all I could do to remain standing. Did she realize what she was doing to me?
She ended the massage, and I gave her one of the fishin' hats to put on. She looked so adorable. I helped her into the boat, and shoved it off into the water, hopping in myself before my feet got wet.
Some people might think it foolhardy to row a boat out into the ocean, and admittedly, I was a hardy fool. But hey, I never got tired - sleep deprived, yeah - tired, nah! The oars placidly churned through the dark blue-gray water, making a peaceful lapping sound. I secretly hoped that whenever I pulled on the oars, Bells would notice my biceps bulging under my tee. I caught her sneaking a peek every now and then. Sweeeet! My heightened wolf vision didn't miss a trick. She wasn't fooling anyone, I saw her ogling me.
"It's so beautiful out today," Bella sighed.
"Yeah, I guess you're only gonna get to enjoy a few more sunny days before . . . well, you know. You're from Arizona. I know how much you miss the sunshine."
"It'll be worth it though," she asserted.
"Will it?" I countered.
"Jacob Black," she grumbled, "don't start wasting time bickering with me; we should be enjoying each other's company for as long as we're here."
"Don't you mean for as long as humanly possible?"
She gave me a glare that would singe the feathers off a chicken.
Okay Jake, that went over well. You really know how "to rock the boat". Change the subject quick. "I guess we're out far enough." I put down the oars. "Let's get out the fishing poles."
I grabbed the poles, and gave one to Bells. The expression on her face was priceless. Could she possibly be any cuter? The fishing line on mine was a little tangled. "Hey Bells, could you get me my penknife? It's over there in one of the containers."
Bells straddled the seat, and then pulled her other leg over so that she was facing away from me. She was looking in the buckets and containers, and suddenly let out a bloodcurdling scream. The boat rocked from side to side as she nearly fell off the seat backwards.
"What is this?" she screeched.
I steadied her on the seat, peered over her shoulder and stifled a laugh. "That," I stated, "is our bait. Mudpuppies are expensive, so instead, I had to dig up some of these. Don't tell me you've never had a close encounter with a worm before."
"Well yeah," she explained, "but not a big wriggling mass of them. Ew!"
"Hand me the bucket, Bells. I'll keep them by me so you don't die of fright."
"I'm not touching that thing. Some of them might escape."
"They can't bite you, Bells," I sniggered.
"I don't care, they're gooey and they're gross! You come get them."
"Okay, we're gonna have to swap seats then. Now, slowly stand up with me, then we'll walk toward each other."
We started the swap, and sure enough, Bells snagged her foot on who knows what. The boat shimmied, and she was pitched straight into my willing arms. "Whoa, steady there," I remarked. I had to hold onto her until the boat quit swaying underneath us. I carefully pivoted the two of us around, and we sat down simultaneously.
I found my knife and cut the tangled line. Pulling the rest of the line through the reel, I attached the hook back on it. "Mission accomplished," I crowed. "Alrighty then, let's coax some of these fish out of the sea and into our frying pan."
I leaned down and snatched a juicy worm out of the bucket. I dangled it in front of Bella. She leaned away. "C'mon Bells, ya gotta bait up your hook."
"I'm not doin' it, Jake. I told you that. Can't you do it for me please?"
"Jeez, Bells, it's just a little worm." Her face was stone. "Here, give me the hook, I'll do it."
I started to thread the hook through the worm. She gasped, "Oh gosh, that poor little worm. You're hurting him."
"If you want to catch a fish, you have to use bait." I gave the pole back to Bells. "He's dead - not feelin' a thing. You can feed him to the fishies now."
I finished baiting my own hook and threw it over the side. Hell, these babies were hungry. I barely lowered the hook, when I got a bite. I reeled in the first catch of the day, and plunked him in the cooler.
Bella's pole began to bob up and down. She shrieked, "I got one Jake!"
I grinned as she struggled to reel in the trout, at least I think it was a sea trout. I pulled her shoulders in toward me and wrapped my own around her. I put my hands over hers and helped her steady the rod. I leaned my cheek against her cheek, all the while resisting the urge to turn my head and nuzzle my nose across her smooth flesh.
Together we reeled in a whopper. He thrashed and tossed about, splattering Bells with salt water. She sputtered and handed the pole to me. I pulled it from the hook, "Into the cooler, big guy," I said.
We caught a few more fish - Bella excited to land one - me excited to be helping her to land one. We stopped for a while to eat lunch.
"Man, this chicken is good." I hesitated for a beat, choosing my words carefully. "Can I ask you something, Bells? Aren't you gonna miss cooking for Charlie and the rest of us hungry males? Be honest with me."
"Yes . . . Look, I know what you're trying to do Jake, but please don't. You'll ruin the last hours I have with my best friend."
"I'm sorry, Bells. I just want you to think seriously about your choice. There will be no turning back when it's done." I could see the uncertainty creeping into her dark eyes.
"I know," she whispered.
Trying to lighten the mood, I yelled, "Okay, lunch break over. Back to work. We can catch a few more trout, then head back." I looked around searching for the shoreline. Ut oh, the current apparently carried us farther away than I had originally planned. No problem, we'll head home a little earlier, that's all.
We were busy laughing and fishing, and suddenly I paid attention to the ominous gray clouds swarming toward us. I didn't want to alarm Bells, but this didn't bode well."Uh, Bells, I think we're gonna have to cut this trip short - check out the sky."
"Holy crow, what the heck happened?" Her eyes turned wide with concern.
"Damn weathermen, you can never trust their forecasts. I hope we can outrun the rain," I joked.
Too late . . . The wind started to howl, the waves rose and fell angrily, and then the rain came done . . . in torrents.
I rowed with all my might, but the current was pulling us further and further out to sea. The waves got choppier - the wind singing louder in our ears. And God, the rain was unmerciful. Damn that weatherman! What about sunny with a slight chance of showers? I couldn't pull against the current any longer, that's when I noticed the island in the distance, Barneget's Island. My dad used to take us there when we were young. But that was when we borrowed the Clearwater's motorboat.
Bells kept herself busy, scooping out the water accumulating in the bottom of the boat. Unfortunately, the rain was pouring down faster than she could bail it out.
The current was moving us closer to the island, so I helped it along, rowing a little faster to get us out of this rotten tempest. Bells was quiet. I knew she was terrified, but I knew where we were. We'd just have to wait out the storm.
The boat finally hit the shoal. I pulled the skiff up onto the rocky shoreline. There used to be a cabin nearby, hopefully it was still standing. I took Bella's hand in mine, grabbed the first aid kit and led her to the cabin. We were both soaked to the skin. Bella's lips were an odd shade of blue, and she was shivering like crazy.
The wind kept blowing us back away from the door, so it took a few tries to jimmy the lock with my penknife. We entered the tiny room; it was dry at least.
"Don't move," I told Bella "I'm gonna start a fire so we can get out of these wet clothes."
I threw some of the wood that was stacked by the fireplace onto the hearth. My first-aid kit had a lighter in it - thank god - and the dry tinder ignited almost instantly.
I gave Bells one of those thin heat-conserving sheets. "Here," I grunted, "Take off your wet things and wrap yourself in this. I'm going back outside to bring in some of the supplies."
Man, it was like a hurricane out there. The wind must have been gusting at 80 miles per hour. I picked up the cooler, Bella's purse, and a few other essentials. I left the fishing poles. If I never saw them again it would be too soon. I raced with them up to the cabin and knocked on the door.
"Bells," I shouted over the gale force wind. "Are ya decent?"
"How decent can I be, wrapped in a sheet? It's no concern of yours anyway."
No concern of mine? What did she mean by that?
I entered the cabin cautiously. Bells was seated by the fire, wrapped in the thin aluminum sheet, still trembling with the cold. "Hey, can I call you 'Silver Bells'? You look like a Christmas present all bundled up like that." She was not amused.
I dropped the supplies on the floor and walked toward her.
Bells lit into me with a vengeance. "You dog . . . ! I see your good luck held out, all right. I can't believe Billy had any part in this."
"What are you talking about, Bells?" I was so confused.
"Don't 'Bells' me! How could you?"she fumed.
"Could I whaaat?" Why the hell are women so cryptic?
'This whole trip . . . fishing . . . I knew there was something' fishy' about it. This was one of your diabolical schemes to get me alone in this cabin. And to think I fell for it. 'Please Bella, please. This could be the last chance we get to be alone together.' Ugh!"
"You've got to be kidding me. Are you nuts? You're practically accusing me of consorting with Mother Nature. I can't control the weather, Bells. As for this cabin, I didn't even know if it was still intact. You should be grateful that I steered us toward this island, we could have been drifting out to Alaska, for cryin' out loud. What do you take me for anyway? A womanizer?"
"If the moccasin fits!" she retorted. What a low blow.
I stomped over to the pile of supplies and grabbed her purse. "Here," I said in exasperation, " call your Dad. Maybe he can alert the coastguard. When he's done with that, he can have me arrested for kidnapping, and attempted romance in a rowboat."
"I can't do that. I didn't bring my cell with me. I was afraid I'd drop it in the water. If I had only known that I was going to be stranded on a deserted island with an demented werewolf, I would have had it glued to my hip."
Bells narrowed her eyes as she continued her tirade. "Do you think you could at least have the decency to get down on my level, so I don't get neck strain staring up at you?"
I sat down on the floor in front of her."Do you want me to massage that kink out?" I taunted.
"No!" She wrapped the sheet around herself tightly, leaving both of her arms free. She took my face in her hands and gazed intently into my eyes. "Look at me Jacob, now tell me the truth. Did you plan this little episode?"
"I swear to you, Bella, I just wanted us to be together. I wanted you to enjoy the sunlight, the food, and being with me, one last time. I'm going to miss you," I croaked.
I placed my hands over hers. She stiffened slightly. "Holy cow, there are welts on your hands, Jake. Let me see."
"I guess my hands aren't used to boat rowing, huh?" I was glad she was distracted. Her mood had shifted from pissed to genuine concern in two seconds flat.
"Oh Jake," she groaned, "your hands are all blistered. Is there any salve in your first-aid kit?"
It was lying on the floor beside the wood pile. I leaned over and retrieved it. Bells took it from me and finding the salve, proceeded to apply it gently to the blisters. I watched the tender expression on her beautiful face as she painstakingly covered each angry ridge.
"There, all done," she crooned, smiling. "Now you better take off your wet clothes. Werewolves can still catch pneumonia, can't they?"
I pulled off my shirt and peered over at Bells. She was ogling me again."Hey pervert, turn the other way," I scolded. Her cheeks turned the most gorgeous shade of crimson. Ha, caught her in the act.
As I removed my jeans, I heard her mutter, "Tightie whities?" Yeah, I was definitely getting to her.
I went into the bathroom, to "empty my tank" so to speak, and found a couple of towels in the cabinet. I wrapped one around me, so Bells didn't have to be embarrassed. Actually, I'm pretty sure she liked what she saw . . . the little minx.
I took a few of the fish out of the cooler, and scaled, then gutted them in the sink. I found a barbeque fork and impaled the trout with it. Poking the flames on the hearth, I found some logs that burned down and laid our dinner on top.
Bells and I ate quietly. The rain and the wind were still whirling about the cabin. We were safe, bathing in the glow of the fireplace. I had my arm around her, huddling her close to my side to keep her warm.
Bells kept eying the bed - the only bed - in the cabin."Tired?" I asked.
"Yeah, but Jake, what are we going to do about the sleeping arrangement?"
Oh, no, not me . . . I wasn't about to screw this up. Let her figure it out. "I'll sleep on the floor, no problem."
"I can't let you do that, it's inhumane . . . I know, we'll split the bed down the middle. You take the right side, I'll take the left. And no funny business, mister."
"Wouldn't dream of it," I agreed. If she only knew . . . I'd been dreaming of this for the past year. Great, now I'd have to try getting that thought out of my head.
I crouched down and scooped Bella up into my arms. I walked across the room, and gently laid her on the bed. "Didn't want you to get your feet cold." I explained.
I lay down on my side of the bed and pulled up the thin quilt that was folded at the foot of the mattress. We were both facing away from each other.
"I mean it Jake, you stay on your side, no trespassing."
"I heard you the first time," I grumbled.
Suddenly we heard a scratching sound at the window and a low growl. Bella sat up, whimpering, "What was that?"
"I'll go see."
I left the cabin, and spotted a bear. I threw a stick at him, shouting, "Go on, get!" He ambled off into the woods, and I ambled on back to bed.
I just got situated again when a pine branch hit the side of the house. In an instant, Bella scrambled over the "great divide" and wrapped her arms around my waist, clinging to me like a piece of saran wrap. Her head was imbedded in the crook of my neck, and her legs were entangled in mine. This was gonna be a looong night.
Jeez, I didn't know what was worse, yearning to have her close to me, or having her so close that my hormones were threatening to explode. Damn, my self-control was teetering on the edge. My body was aching to turn toward her and ravish her in every way imaginable. Right at this moment, I hated being such a guy. I was scared to death that I might actually do something really stupid. I had to wonder though, was she feeling the same way?
Somehow we got through the night. I guess Bells was warm enough, 'cuz when I awoke, she was on top of the quilt, in her white cotton bra and skimpy bikini panties. How could she do this to me? That scene was going to play over and over in my brain, wreaking havoc with my already faltering self-control. I dropped the towel and my briefs outside the door and phased. I ran through the forest until I could feel myself cooling down. Unbelievably, I was thankful for the the wind and the unrelenting downpour.
As I neared the cabin, I heard Bella softly calling my name. Then it became louder, until she was screaming in fright. I hurriedly pulled on the briefs, and rearranged the towel. When I opened the door she plowed into my chest. "Jake," she shouted, "Jake, where were you – I was so scared. Please don't leave me like that again." Her arms were around my neck in a choke-hold, but I wasn't complaining. Her little heart was fluttering in her chest, and her body quaking. I held her close. Thank God, she had clothes on.
"Shh, it's okay, Bells, I'm not leaving you alone. We're both gonna get out of here together when the storm passes. I promise."
She nodded, and wiped away a tear.
XXX
The wind was still whipping up outside and the rain never let up all damn day. I was beginning to get worried. If we didn't get home soon, I would get arrested. Then it struck me, I had a direct line to the wolves. What an idiot! I could have contacted one of them when I had phased. I let Bells know what I was doing before she freaked again, then I went outside and "turned myself inside out."
Sam was the only one out patrolling, but that was enough. I told him where we were holed up. He was going to spread the word of our whereabouts, but he said the coastguard couldn't get through the storm either. It looked like the gale would subside by tomorrow, and we'd probably get picked up in the morning.
Bells and I passed the time, talking about our plans for college, eating more fish kabobs, and playing cards. It was always wise to bring a deck along, in case the fish weren't biting.
In the evening the rain dissipated, and was replaced by a severe drop in temperature. And I mean it dropped like arock. The small fireplace was no match for the increasing cold. Believe me when I say there was no dividing line in the bed that night. I was for once thankful for the heat I could share. She was shivering even after we were cuddled together for the first half hour.
Bella's teeth were chattering as she remarked, "Doesn't this seem familiar? This is like an encore of that night in the tent!" Sure, sure, but thank God that miserable leech wasn't around this time. Having another icicle taking up space in here wouldn't have helped matters much. Her teeth began to chatter a little faster, her shivering getting worse.
"This is ridiculous," I bellowed."Take your clothes off Bells. We need skin contact so you can absorb my heat. Don't argue with me. This is a fact, survival one oh one, just like I told that bloodsucker of yours. Do you want to be modest and dead, or naked and alive?"
I yanked off my pants and shirt and threw them on the foot of the bed. Bells hesitated but when her teeth started chattering again, she relented.
"I'm frrr-eezing J-Jake, but my p-p-aan-ties are st-staa-ing put.
She stripped down and I leaned against her back in spoon position, enveloping the front of her upper shoulders with one arm. My other arm I left sheltering the cool, trembling skin around her waist. I whispered in her ear, "Relax honey, go to sleep now. I won't ever hurt you. I promise I won't go roaming into any 'uncharted territory'.You can trust me. I love you too much."
Slowly, I felt her body go limp. Her breathing became deep and even, her heart beating out a steady rhythm. I tucked her head under my chin, and kissed her hair. Was this our last night together? Was this goodbye? I fought the lump rising up in my throat.
XXX
Morning came and the sun was peeking out of the clouds. This was it, then. We were going home today. It was still ice cold in the cabin, and the wood pile was down to two logs. I was pulling away from Bells so I could go outside. We needed more wood for the fire. She instinctively turned and reached out for me. My heart stuttered for a moment. Dammit, I ached to return to her side, never to leave her. Can it Jake, in five weeks, she'll belong to someone else. Treasure these memories. That's all you'll have . . . memories.
I pulled on my shirt and jeans and trudged out to the wood pile. This will be the last time I see her before her wedding day. I took up the nearby axe and placed a chunk of wood on the chopping block. Thunk! That one was history, and thunk . . . so was the next one, and the one after that. Thunk! Thunk! Pretty soon, the chopping got faster and faster. Thunk! Why isn't it me? Thunk! What did I do that was so terribly wrong? Thunk! Why did I have to love her so? Thunk, thunk! I threw down the axe in desperation. I sat down on the cold hard ground, drawing my knees up to my chest. I couldn't hold back a minute longer. My emotions spewed out, unleashing the heartache that had been pent up for so long. I broke out in loud sobs. The tears streamed down my face like rain. What was I going to do without her? Bells . . .
I heard a soft voice speak my name."Jake, is that you?"
Bella's form appeared from the back of the cabin. She spotted me on the ground. She ran toward me, but I turned my face away. That's it Jake, let her see you sitting there like a crybaby. She knelt down in front of me, pulling my cheek toward her. Her liquid brown eyes gazed into mine.
"Jake, what is it? Are you hurt?"
I looked up at her with the tears still flowing down my cheeks. "I don't want to take you back home, Bells. I wish I could just lift you up into my arms and run away with you. Why can't you love me the way that I love you? Why? Why can't you stay with me? Why won't you choose me?"
"I thought that maybe this trip might open your eyes, make you see things more clearly. I guess all it made you see was how pathetic I am. I'm sorry. I failed to make you think–really think about what you're doing."
"You didn't fail, Jake. You have given me a lot to think about. And you're wrong . . . why do you think I fight so hard against you. I know how much you love me. You know I love you too, don't you?"
"Yeah . . . but you love him more."
"I don't know about that. I may have to rethink it."
What did she just say? "Do you really mean that?"
"Holy cow, yes, I think I do."
She brushed away the tears from my face, and pulled me to my feet.
"So . . . you . . . wait . . . does this mean . . . Uh, Can I kiss you, Bells?"
"No, it's may I kiss you?" she teased.
Continuing to sniffle, I stammered out, "Hell, yeah, C'mere girl." My hands were encircled about her waist pulling her up onto the chopping block. New tears were forming as I peered back into those chocolate eyes. My God, could she be any more beautiful than now, gazing at me with love in those very eyes. I wet my lips anticipating what was to come. I bent over her and covered her waiting mouth with my own. I was totally overcome with emotion. I took the tresses on the back of her head in one hand, and placed my other hand on the soft skin of her cheek. Her hands were laced around my neck, stroking the hair at the base of my head. Our lips moved in unison. It was so warm–so real–so natural–it was as easy as breathing. Our hearts beat together as one, our breath mingled. I felt like our spirits were uniting in joy.
"Jake," she breathed, "my Jacob."
Whispering, I choked out, "I love you, Bells."
Our kiss became more intense, more passionate. I felt her very being penetrate every pore of my body. She was part of me. I couldn't deny it. I was helpless. I could no longer be separated from her. She was everywhere, she was everything and I was nothing without her.
My hands were on her waist, her shoulders, her hips. Her hands glided over my body in the same way and her touch on my skin was heaven. I could barely stand it. I had to pull away before I burst into flames.
Reluctantly, I suggested, "We better go inside, we're going home today. Remember?"
Bells sat there quietly for awhile, lost in thought. I could almost sense the gears turning round and round in her mind.
"Wait a minute, Jake. One thing first–you know that I have to see Edward. I need to talk to him and explain my turnabout. He's not a bad guy, Jacob. He's going to be heartbroken. I feel awful about breaking our engagement. What is this going to do to him . . . ? what is this going to do to his family? You know that his love for me is real." There was a question in her eyes as she added, "What can I possibly say? Tell me what to say to him, Jake."
I looked at her with a twinkle in my eye and blurted out: "Tell him you've Gone Fishin'" Yeah, and you're coming back with quite a catch too!
A/N: Boy this was sure long for a one shot. I could've added more, but I just had to stop. Please note,? Mr. Grudgemeier, Wallace, and Ladmo, were all the stars of a local TV kiddie show in the Phoenix area. They were on the air for years, and were much beloved, especially by me.
I'm not usually a Jake/Bella fan but with your set-up, story, and explanations I can see how Bella could possibly choose Jake. But bottom line with the wolves, if he imprints on someone he'll drop Bella like a hot potato. Even against his will he will have to be with his imprint. That's why Jake/Bella would NEVER actually work because he didn't imprint on her. But this was good and I enjoyed reading it.
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